THE PERFECT HUSBAND
My name is Bob,
Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Dianna. When I
took "early retirement" last year, it became necessary for Dianna to get a
full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we
needed. Shortly after she started working I noticed she was beginning to
show her age. I usually get home from the Golf Course about the same time
she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost
always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts
dinner.
I don't yell at her; Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me
when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's
Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home
cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now, it's
not unusual for them to sit at the table for several hours after dinner. I
do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening
that they won't clean themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does
seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed. I really
think my experience as a teacher helps a lot. I consider telling people
what they ought to do to be one of my strong points.
Now that she has gotten older, she does seem to get tired so much more
quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the basement. Sometimes she says she
just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of
this; as she finishes up the laundry the next evening, I'm willing to
overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to
the Monday lodge meeting, or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club, or to
Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling, or something like that, I will tell her to
wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little
more time to do some of those odds and ends like shampooing the dog,
vacuuming or dusting.
Also, if I had a really good day on the course and it was wet and muddy, my
clubs are a mess, so I let her clean them, you know.....get the grit off
the grips and a little light Brillo on the club faces at a casual pace. My
golf bag is heavy so I lift it out of the trunk for her. Women are
delicate, have weak wrists and can't lift heavy stuff as good as men. But I
did tell her I don't like to be wakened during my after golf nap, so rather
than bother me, she can put them back in the trunk when she's finished.
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example, she will
say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
during her lunch hour. But boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I
just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two
or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also
remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any
(if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong
points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She
had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try
not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice,
big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while.
And, as long as she is making one for her self, she may as well make one
for me too, then take her break by my hammock. That way she can talk with
me until I fall asleep.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Dianna. I'm
not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find
it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do,
how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you
just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because
of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After
all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
Signed, Bob
EDITOR'S NOTE: Bob died suddenly Thursday. He was found with a Calloway
extra long 50 inch Big Bertha Driver II rammed up his posterior, with only
2 inches of grip showing. His wife Dianna was arrested, but the Grand Jury
accepted her defense that he accidentally sat on it and she was released on
Friday.
My name is Bob,
Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Dianna. When I
took "early retirement" last year, it became necessary for Dianna to get a
full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we
needed. Shortly after she started working I noticed she was beginning to
show her age. I usually get home from the Golf Course about the same time
she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost
always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts
dinner.
I don't yell at her; Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me
when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's
Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home
cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now, it's
not unusual for them to sit at the table for several hours after dinner. I
do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening
that they won't clean themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does
seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed. I really
think my experience as a teacher helps a lot. I consider telling people
what they ought to do to be one of my strong points.
Now that she has gotten older, she does seem to get tired so much more
quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the basement. Sometimes she says she
just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of
this; as she finishes up the laundry the next evening, I'm willing to
overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to
the Monday lodge meeting, or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club, or to
Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling, or something like that, I will tell her to
wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little
more time to do some of those odds and ends like shampooing the dog,
vacuuming or dusting.
Also, if I had a really good day on the course and it was wet and muddy, my
clubs are a mess, so I let her clean them, you know.....get the grit off
the grips and a little light Brillo on the club faces at a casual pace. My
golf bag is heavy so I lift it out of the trunk for her. Women are
delicate, have weak wrists and can't lift heavy stuff as good as men. But I
did tell her I don't like to be wakened during my after golf nap, so rather
than bother me, she can put them back in the trunk when she's finished.
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example, she will
say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
during her lunch hour. But boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I
just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two
or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also
remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any
(if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong
points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She
had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try
not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice,
big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while.
And, as long as she is making one for her self, she may as well make one
for me too, then take her break by my hammock. That way she can talk with
me until I fall asleep.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Dianna. I'm
not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find
it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do,
how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you
just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because
of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After
all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
Signed, Bob
EDITOR'S NOTE: Bob died suddenly Thursday. He was found with a Calloway
extra long 50 inch Big Bertha Driver II rammed up his posterior, with only
2 inches of grip showing. His wife Dianna was arrested, but the Grand Jury
accepted her defense that he accidentally sat on it and she was released on
Friday.
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